Grief

There is a hole in the world where our dear friend and fellow writer once was.

It still doesn't seem real to me. I want to go to his house, hug all the staff, and see his room. Is it really empty?

I didn't realize how difficult it was going to be to have writer's group without him. On the way to the mall, I listened to the radio on scan. The walk from the parking lot was long. I was so obviously alone, with no one on my arm telling me stories.

The smells of the mall, the arctic temp, and the never ending 80's mix blaring from the speakers were all the same. But it wasn't the same. It was hollow and empty.

I wanted to tell everyone that he's gone. The people at McDonald's who sold us a Coke every Thursday. The people who work at Nordstom Cafe. The sweet Asian couple who walk by our table every week. I guess I want them to care that he was here at all.

My heart is screaming, "Please don't be gone! Come back!"

He was supposed to come over last week for a movie. He was going to come with me to the D.C. Awakening in Oct. We had plans. God, you get him for the rest of eternity, couldn't we have had him for a few more decades?

Who am I to question You? You said that you would rescue and protect those who love You. Jeff has been rescued and he is protected. Could you please give him a really big hug for me? Tell him I love him and I'll see him soon.

Anyone else need to vent?